I Should Have Taken the Ride: What One Mistake Taught Me About Accountability

I'm moving forward. I can't change the decision I made. I can't go back and take the ride I should have taken. I can't go back and listen to my friends or listen to my wife when she begged me not to go.

But I believe God is allowing me to learn something through this experience. I have to lick my wounds, learn from this, and make sure I would never put myself through something like this again in my life. Period.

Sometimes God allows us to face the consequences of our decisions so we can learn lessons that we may not have understood before. I believe this experience is teaching me to listen, to humble myself, and to never take the people who love me for granted.

My friends offered me a ride.
My wife begged me not to go.
People who loved me were trying to protect me.
And I didn't listen.

That is something I have to live with and learn from.

So please, if someone you love tells you something because they are worried about your safety, listen to them. Take their advice seriously. You never know what can happen in the next few seconds, minutes, hours, or days.

You may think, “I'll be fine.”
You may think, “It won't happen to me.”
You may think, “I'll just be gone for a little while.”
But you don't know what is waiting for you around the next corner.

That's why I'm choosing to learn from this.

I can learn.
I can take accountability.
I can make better decisions.
I can listen.
I can grow.

And most importantly, I can use my experience to hopefully prevent someone else from making the same mistake.

This experience also showed me how close I came to shutting down WarriorsGate Entertainment and my other ventures, stepping away from everything, and going off the grid because I didn't want to connect with people I love.

But I'm thankful for the people who love me and continued to support me no matter what. I'm thankful for the people who continued praying with me and reminding me that I wasn't alone.

It's tough not having my dad here.

I wish I could talk to him man-to-man. I wish I could tell him about my mental health, my experiences, what I've been going through, and everything I've learned.

Not having my dad around has been one of the hardest things I have ever experienced in my life.

There are moments when I wish I could just sit down with him and talk.

But I know I have people around me who love me.
I have my wife.
I have my children.
I have my family.
And I have God.

My children need their father. That means I have another reason to keep moving forward, keep learning, keep growing, and keep becoming a better man.

Please don't suffer alone

There is one more thing I want to say.

If you are struggling with your mental health, being overworked, financial stress, grief, family problems, loneliness, alcohol, or simply feeling like everything is becoming too much, please don't keep it all inside.

Talk to someone.
Talk to your spouse.
Talk to your family.
Talk to a friend.
Talk to someone you trust.

And if you don't know who to talk to, call or text 988.

You don't have to wait until you're at your breaking point to ask for help.

Sometimes we convince ourselves that we have to be strong for everybody else. We have to keep working. We have to take care of our family. We have to keep the business going. We have to keep smiling and tell everybody, “I'm good.”

But sometimes you're not good.
And that's okay to admit.

As a black Deaf man, I also want other Deaf people to know that you can reach out for support in ASL. You don't have to struggle alone because you're Deaf or because communicating with someone feels difficult.

Please reach out. Please talk to somebody. Please stay.

Your life is worth more than whatever problem you're facing today.

So if you're young and reading this, or if you simply needed this reminder tonight, please remember:

Your car can wait. Your pride can wait. Getting home safely cannot.

Please, I beg you—take every word I've shared here seriously. Let it stay with you whenever you find yourself in a situation where you shouldn't be driving.

Take the ride.

I should have taken the ride.

Now I hope someone else learns from me and takes theirs.

I am thankful to God for teaching me this lesson, thankful for my wife, who will always stand alongside me, and thankful for the ability to be here with my beautiful children who need their father.

I made a mistake. I take accountability. I am learning. And I'm moving forward.

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